Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
