He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
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