oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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