If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
