I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
