Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
