She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Randomize
