the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Randomize
