We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
