another moral hangover. fuck.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
