can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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