great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
