yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
