I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize
