He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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