p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Randomize
