Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
