help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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