I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
