Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
