This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
