i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize
