is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
