so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
