dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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