why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize