I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
