So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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