I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
well, you know. whores of a feather.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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