Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Jerry, you need to find god
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Randomize