you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
