Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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