I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
