I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
