I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
