she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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