i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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