Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
