they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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