I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Randomize
