This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
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