I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Randomize
