WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Randomize
