So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
