naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
