i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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