If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
