Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
