White coat. Heels.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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