Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
