hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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