love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Vodka?
Forever.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
